)*(Walking Alone)*(

[Mage]

It was a beautiful day upon the claiming grounds and everyone seemed happy, except for the buckskin painted fae. This was now her second time coming to these grounds and she didn't really care who she went with for she felt as if she would be returning anyways no matter what any of the stallions promised. She hadn't talked to anyone in months for she had stayed by herself in the mare grounds. She walked in silently, her head low with no intentions of bringing it up for anyone. She glanced around, seeing happy mares leaving happily with stallions that had made promises to them that they have no intentions of keeping. She let out a sigh and looked down to gaze at her reflection though she only thought about how she let her newly born foal down.

[Reflection]

Dread and anticipation swirled inside of a brute who's pelt was dyed a deep black. Scars lined his midnight hued rump, and a long and deep scar, plainly recent, was sliced down his neck, slightly open and with a little blood still seeping out. As the stag inhaled gently he continued to let his feet guide him anywhere. For he was back in the Arrowheads, and with one single mission in mind. A task he had never attempted before...and yet...it hardly seemed foreign, or new. For throughout his disappearance, he found remorse and a sickening emotion of sorrow for all that he had...shattered...to the death of life, or simply to the death of will or love. All though, had been painful to the victim, and the worst part had been that...he had cherished the power at the time. At the time he had ruthlessly murdered...and much worse. He had challenged stags, winning and then leaving the loser(the dead one)'s herd to die and parish in helpless confusion and sorrow, along with disappointment that their lead had let them down. yes, at the time he had been that cruel, that heartless. he plunged into other equine's lives and ended them mercilessly, or simply left forboding return. either one was vile and sinister. and for those deeds, he now hated himself...or what he had become... Although, now he knew that he was different...he was...--well it didn't matter what he was...it only mattered that he cared, and he had a heart... Though he still wondered....would that be enough to complete the task set before him? Could he be strong enough to face her? How could he though? After he had abandoned her... Abandoned her after all she had done for him... After she showed him love...and compassion...after she started to heal him.... After she changed him... After that ALL, he had left her... Oh god, he had been so...horrid to her... To leave her like that, and not even think about it until 'twas far too late... What a monster he had been.... And sometimes he wondered, was he still? No. He wasn’t. And he knew it deep down, and out front all at the same time. He wasn’t the monster he used to be… for he had something now, that he never could’ve imagined before…never.

As he bowed his head in sorrow and pain he trudged on in no particular direction. Though along with his remorse and dread, there was also hope and pride…pride in knowing that for once, he was doing the right thing. Throughout his absence he learned that sometimes the right thing to do, is usually the more difficult path, And that note, certainly applied in this situation. For, he wasn’t coming back and disappearing, avoiding her, and he wasn’t staying far from the arrowheads, and he wasn’t ruthlessly blundering across lands…no. He was finding her… finding her to apologize…even though he knew that what he had done, could never fade away, and could never be taken back. And he wouldn’t be surprised if she ignored him, or reacted bitterly to his presence… in fact, he almost expected it…almost. Though something told him that there was still a chance that she could, in some way, understand… Because the brute knew that if anyone could, it would be her… And so, he continued through the woods, traveling by habit, through the shadows, undetectable to none, other then some down wind of him most likely. And as he naturally navigated through the trees and boulders, he slowly raised his steady navy orbs, which for months now, had stayed a blue hue, and not a red glint of any sort… And with this knowledge he was soothed just a bit more, in knowing that he was not the monster he had been before. Suddenly he scented an equine to his right, in a clearing, and the brute figured that he must be in the claiming grounds, for throughout the clearing there were scattered pairs of stags and femmes speaking rapidly or harshly to each other, no doubt the stags trying to woo the femmes, and the femmes either falling for them, or resisting harshly. Though the fae he laid his orbs on in curiosity was a buckskin paint fae who drooped her elegant tiara down in sad sorrow. Pain shuddered through her orbs, and the brute certainly would’ve gone to her in worry, if he were not on an extremely important mission. Though, as the brute turned away and stepped back on course some indecipherable force pulled his navy chasms back to her once more, and as he shifted his weight slightly, a weak and mossy, buried hollow log snapped with a loud crack, starting the brute and spooking him back a few noisy steps. With an exasperated sigh the brute turned to the femme and decided that she must’ve heard the crack, and so as he was about to step out and explain shortly, a spark of realization suddenly shuddered through him. Because at second look at her his heart pounded faster, and his breaths grew shallow…could it be… but before the brute could decide the odds, he stepped out of the shadows into the sunlight, his navy orbs wide and filled with dreading and hopeful inquiry, and his tassles long and dark wavered against his serpentine, as he stepped one unsure step towards the femme, and questioned in a whispery and disbelieving tonation

“Fantasia?.

[Mage]

Dirt showed its self, the mares white seemed a light brown and her golden buckskin coloring was dull. She hadn't taken any acknowledge to her looks for she really didn't care. Her mane and tail tangles and ratted with dirt and pine needles stuck within it. She had once walked around with meat on her bones and had been a well muscled mare with her head up for she didn't let her past show through her and had always kept her pride. But it seemed to be all over now. When she had first entered the Arrowheads she had promised herself never to let anything pull her down again and that everything that happened would only make her stronger. Perhaps in the future it would make her stronger but she had to get over it now first. She continued looking at her reflection in the water, her once beautiful chocolate orbs had sparkled but now seemed to only be a dull brown. Then her ears picked up the sound of a branch breaking. It wasn't a break from a small animal such as a squirrel but that of a horse. She didn't really show any acknowledge of knowing that someone was there but who ever it was seemed to hesitate as if they didn't actually want to come over. She managed to bring her head around though to take a look at who it was only a few feet away from her. No emotion went through her eyes but her heart skipped a beat, the large black stallion stood within her presence once again and now she didn't know what to do.

His words seemed shaky and uncertain. Did she really look that much different. The buckskin fae turned her dial more to take a look at herself, she was disappointed and for some reason now she actually cared and wanted to run away so he wouldn't see her this way, but it was too late for that now. There was a short pause after he spoke as the fae was unsure of what to say. So many things ran through her mind. Emotions flooded her as she didn't know how to feel, sad, happy, angry. She was happy to have him back, standing before her and actually seemed to be looking for her but angry because he had abandoned her rather quickly and now he showed his face again. She raised her head for the first time since the death of her second foal, ears pricked but rotated unsure of how she actually felt towards the one she still felt like she loved. Her voice was still strong though, but she couldn't help to let it show a hint of happiness to see him again.

That is my name.

[Reflection]

[glow=red,1,600]At the femme's reply emotions flooded into the stag's orbs and heart, along with an endless list of questions. Had he done this to her? Did she remember him? Did she hate him? Did she still love him? Would she accept him? Would he reject him? Would the arrowhead stallions seek revenge against him? would they take their anger out on Fantasia? at that last thought, fire rose in his orbs, they would not ever harm Fantasia, whether she hated him or not, he would never let them harm her. Never.

Taking another look at the mare who had saved him from himself, he note with agony at her obviously unhealthy state, in the mind in body. Dirt showed its self upon her pelt, her white seemed a light brownish and her former gleaming golden buckskin coloring was dull. Her mane and tail was knotted and had tangles and was ratted with dirt and pine needles stuck deep within it. Her head raised slightly, but not as much as before. Before she had had meat on her bones and walked around with a dignified pride. She had always had a striking clean and yet carefree look, and she had always kept herself well guarded and never let her past take over. But something had clearly happened to destroy that. And the stag knew with an aching heart that he was almost definently the one who had brought her to this state. Oh, how could he face her? But with a sudden and quite obvious realization he knew that he was facing her. it was something he had to do. And so, as he was about to speak the apology, his heart spoke first...

Are you alright?!

He asked with worry shining in his orbs and tears at the corners. he needed to know she was fine. It was more important...much. She was more important. that was the whole reason why he was back here, in this land where he was hated. In this land whee he had brought uneeded fury and ruthless destruction. Oh...why?... If only he could just go back in time...go back to fix everything...or to at least attempt to...[/glow]

[Mage]

Fantasia had managed to stay strong when Desore left her. She hadn't let his disappearance hit her and change her but then she tried to move on and everything seemed to change. Clockwork gave her a foal but then disappeared. He wasn't there for her and then she gave birth to a beautiful filly but once again the stallion wasn't there and Fantasia wasn't able to protect the filly on her own and no one was there to help her get through it. Through out her lifetime stallion after stallion had disappointed her and now Desore was here to do it again. She was angry but yet still sad at the same time.

Am I alright?

Her voice carried a sting within it. Not just for Desore but all the stallions for she no longer wanted to depend on them. Her mood seemed to flash again though remembering what had been said at the mare grounds and what had actually given Fantasia hope. He had come back and her orbs looked up into his only to see that he really did care. He was here for her and she wanted to jump forward and stand as close as she could to him but her muscles tensed up as she held herself back. The death of her foal was not Desore's fault, it was Clockworks. Perhaps Fantasia had just made a bad desicion again. Maybe she should have just stayed with her gut for she only wanted Desore.

Well lets see..

Her voice changed, now a bit teasing but still keeping a slight sting to it. And a gleam shinned in her brown eyes. Would she take him back?

You left the Lake, never to return. I find out you killed a mare and then left the Arrowheads without a word. I was so angry that I tried to just move on and decided to try and have a foal with the stallion that took over. The stallion disappears just like they always do. I had a beautiful palomino painted filly that only came out to become a meal for the lions because I wasn't able to protect her.

Now tell me, would you be alright.

Her voice had grown stronger as her body filled with anger. She could still remember the screams of her foal as the lions jumped her. Though Fantasia had managed to get rid of the lions it still hadn't been enough to save the painted foal from bleeding to death.

[Reflection]

[glow=red,1,600]Desore watched as she replayed her past, and was taken aback by her sudden stinging words. Am I alright? She repeated Desore’s question with almost sarcasm it seemed. And she seemed to feel pure anger and fault towards Desore. Though suddenly her mood seemed to change with a flash suddenly as she remembered something. And as she began to speak again there was a bit of a teasing tonation to it. And a playful gleam glimmered in her coffee orbs. Hope suddenly began to form in Desore once more and as he slowly regained himself he was completely unprepared for the harsh and bitter words she spoke next. You left the Lake, never to return. I find out you killed a mare and then left the Arrowheads without a word. I was so angry that I tried to just move on and decided to try and have a foal with the stallion that took over. The stallion disappears just like they always do. I had a beautiful palomino painted filly that only came out to become a meal for the lions because I wasn't able to protect her. As he listened to her words tears swelled back into his optics and his breathing grew shallower as he listened in pain, and as he noted the truth in what she spoke. Guilt vibrated through him thoroughly, as he replayed her words and picked out the absolute truth. Yes, I left her… I killed Thersandra…I left in fury… and then… but Desore was unable to finish his thoughts because tears began unstoppably flowing down, and he broke eye contact with her. She had tried to move on….And then a stallion had betrayed her just as I had…and then…her foal… As she concluded with a bitterly stinging question Desore raised his crown slowly not knowing what to say, and yet knowing so dearly exactly what he had to say. Though he found it hard to begin…I-...Fantasia…I mean…Well…He sighed as he sputtered out the words, and he took a deep breath and raised his optics to hers as he spoke.

No.

And Fantasia, I’m so sorry. I am so dearly sorry. And I know that an apology will never truly fix the past, but it’s the only place to start. I am at fault. I am guilty. And I hate what I was, and what I still am deep down. I hate the past, and if there was ever a choice laid out for me, to wither end my life or end your pain by mending the past, I would automatically give my life up to destroy the p by mending the past, I would automatically give my life up to destroy the pain I have caused you. I love you Fantasia, and I was a fool to not realize it before. I do not expect you to love me back after what I have done…But could you find it in your heart to somehow forgive me?



[/glow]

[Mage]

Fantasia watched as Desore tried to mutter out some words and then crystal drops began to flow from his blue-ish hued orbs. She felt bad for it was her words that caused it but yet again he had caused much more pain to her. The buckskin paint still felt bad, it wasn't all his fault. Desore hadn't made the other stallion come or go and he didn't cause the death of her foals. She softened her gaze upon the black stallion and listened as he spoke. His words actually made her happy, he wanted to do good and as he came to an end the last words echoed in her mind. could you find it in your heart to somehow forgive me?

She had forgotten her heart for a while because everything hurt and she didn't want to feel the pain. If she gave him her heart again would he just step on it again. Fantasia had never been too judgemental and never kept to many grudges and when she was young she always forgave everyone. But lots had happened since then and forgiveness came a little less but she still wanted to be with Desore. Her heart still longed for the big brute for in her heart she wasn't a brute or just another stag. This was the one she wanted to love for the rest of her life but she had to let him go for a while so that he could figure out what he really wanted to. A smirk crossed her maw and now she stepped forward and by his side. She lifted her head up and rubbed her neck up against his and spoke.

I will give you my forgiveness. But if you leave me again then kill me first before you leave.

Her words were soft but still to the point. She could have moved on after Desore left, yes it had hurt but she could and almost had recovered from it but the death of another foal had hit her breaking point. She thought of her foals and tears ran through her eyes as she tried to hold them back but they rolled down her tan face and she pressed closer to Desore. She had comfort by her side and didn't want him to leave again.

[Reflection]

[glow=red,1,600]As her words came forth Desore's heart swelled, and he rubbed his muzzle on her neck gently I will never leave you again... He promised, and met his navy blue orbs to hers. As tears began to roll down her cheeks, Desore pressed up against her and nudged her gently. It's all okay, it's all in the past now.... he whispered, and rubbed her neck gently. A soft breeze drifted through and the stag broke eye contact as he looked up and gazed out at the mountains, and the sky. This was where he belonged, and he wished with his entire soul that he had never left, and that he had never killed thersandra, and that he had never been a murderer. So much had changed since then, and it was incredebly hard to believe that he was actually back here. but here he was. He was so different then before, and yet he was the same in many ways. the dark ways though were only deep down, yet his love for Fantasia was the same, if not greater...[/glow]

OOC: Ugh, sorry no muse. XP lol

[Mage]

Fantasia held her had close to Desore's shoulder. Tears had stopped running down her delicate face and she felt content. Though there was still pain in her heart Desore was her protector and everything felt right once again. She collected herself pulling herself back and standing once again, she was a strong mare with a bad past but she hoped to keep it in her past for now on. She tossed her forelock to one side and she looked upon the black stallion. He had changed somewhat from the first time they had met but certain things had changed about him and it seemed for the better. A slight smirk crossed her mug and she walked past him, her orbs glittered once again and her walk showed that she had returned. Her head held elagently, ears pricked, and she picked up her feet instead of dragging them. She flicked her tail at him as she passed and then she turned and came up on his other side. She would not prance around him like an uncontrollable little filly but even she could flirt a little, couldn't she?

She stopped beside him, he stood taller then her and was more muscled but that didn't mean he completely over powered her. She loved him but she would stand up to him if she didn't like something and so picked up her head with a smile and said, Where to now Desore?. Would he try to take back the Lake or would they find a new home? She looked up to her stallion and awaited his reply.

[Reflection]

[glow=red,1,600]Desore raised his head in curiosity as Fantasia prepared to speak, and as words finally fell from her lips Desore's ears pricked forward in content. It was likely a good thing that he had not reclaimed the Diamond Lake. It would've brought sour memories to the both of them, but how would Fantasia react to the land that Desore had newly claimed? In the past opinions of others had not mattered to Desore, but now it was automatic, caring about her emotions as well. Because after all the reflections he had made, Desore had reached the sure conclusion that no matter what, Fantasia's life was worth a billion times more then his...And she was so innocent, and beautiful. Though, yet, she had been forced through so much unbearable pain. It surged guilt through every inch of Desore's body and mind.

But then again, the rash and horrid side of him that had once been, did not exist at all around Fantasia. Around others it was a off and on thing, But it was never even close to as terrible as he had been. Fantasia's question still hung limply and unanswered in the cool, refreshing air. At last the black stag's denim hued eyes turned gently to Fantasia as smooth, soft words came from Desore's vocals.

I have claimed the Emerald Hills, which was abandoned by Numaric Light, or something or rather. It seems he and his herd have moved on out of the Arrowheads, or most of them. That would be the ideal place to travel, But to me, it doesn't matter where I am, as long as you're close by. So the decision of where to travel is up to you... [/glow]

[Mage]

Her tail swayed lightly, brushing up against her sides to force the flies off her painted coat. Her brown orbs gentle as she looked upon Desore for his answer and her muscles rippled beneith her pelt. Wild flowers were blooming and the sweet scent of flowers flowed into Fantasia's nostrils with every breath. It was nice to see spring but memories still held their place within her mind as she heard the terror in her fillies voice as she was attacked. Fantasia should have been able to protect her, Clock should have helped. But no. Finally she snapped back and realized where she was again, beside Desore, as he was replying to her answer. The Emerald Hills, would now be theres. Diamond Lake had been nice but Fantasia would shatter if she went back. A slight smirk crawled upon her maw and a spark was in her eyes. She liked seeing new places and so the Emerald Hills was where she would go with Desore.
I will go anywhere with you Desore. The Emerald Hills sound like a nice place.